Over the last few hundred years he’s learnt a lot. Besides what he’d set out to learn he’s inadvertently memorized his friends’ responses to anything he says.
Even if he says the same thing ten times in a row, any vocal or facial tic changed has a butterfly effect, and he’s come to know literally all of them.
It’s made reality go a bit wonky, made it a bit like a jetksi simulator game, at least from what he’s heard. His friends aren’t looking at him, they’re looking through him, and he’s begun to dissapear for it.
In his efforts to save the universe he’s become painfully aware of his insignificance in it and the simple role he plays. Because his life has become just that. A role. He’ll hit the lines that gets them the quickest results and he’ll hit them again and again.
He’ll improvise from time to time, make jokes with his friends, and enjoy his conversation like he’s still there. But there came a point where he couldnt think of any new jokes to tell, and that might’ve been decades ago. He doesn’t remember when time got away from him.
He still tries to break out of his dissociative state though. God, he still tries. Because sometimes Loki breaks. Like now.
“I’ve been doing this for a very, very long time. Reliving this moment, learning everything I can, everything I have to. I haven’t been outside the TVA and if I’m honest sometimes I think I miss the sun?“ His voice cracks. He’s in it now, and his skin feels tight with the embarrassing open show of emotion. He positions his hands on the console to square his shoulders and get himself together when-
"Aw man, come here.” He’s encircled by… warm arms. Tweed clad. Mobius’ shampoo is… coconut? He’s hugging him. This hasn’t happened in any reset. “You’re just tired, Loki. Everyone needs a break from time to time, even gods, alright?”
Ridiculous, cartoonish man. His best friend. The love of his life, not a simulation. Loki hugs him back desperately, and finds peace. Over the next century or two he wastes a lot of time with Mobius. He never remembers, but always looks like he does. Every minute is worth it.
Are you alright, honey? You’ve barely put your blorbo in situations
Okay but back when I could afford a therapy my psychiatrist asked if I had written any fanfiction or planned any out in my head, and I was “nah, not really.” And she nodded and looked down at her notes and was like “so how do you feel about possibly trying Zoloft?”
I started laughing and she was like “I know it sounds funny but it’s been six months without you engaging in your favorite hobby and that’s a sign the depression is getting to a point where we might why try some treatments with meds in addition to therapy.”
hi, im the anon that was asking about subscribing to works on ao3, i really appreciate the answers i've read so far. i feel like i understand why other readers do this and i feel quite flattered by my readers doing so now. thank you so much for your answers :)
actually the best ship dynamic is i would kill for you. i would kill anyone who layed a hand on you. please let me kill for you. please let me show my devotion by dirtying my hands, it’s the only way i know how. let me destroy anything that hurts you. i’ve hurt you too. i’m destroying myself.
I want them comfortably married and happy and bickering over their morning beverages and also I want them to fuck nasty on the living room floor because they can’t wait another second
When beloved mutuals are like oh no tumblr might be going down add me on discord! like okay I love you I’m kissing you on the mouth I’ll die without your little posts but am I going to message you? are you going to message me? we all know this is not going to happen.we r open pasture creatures we both need a place to post freely
Underrated friendship: Loki and OB. Two brilliant, soft-spoken, lonely people deeply interested in science/magic, who don’t exactly fit in anywhere and who have a wonderfully nerdy rapport—they meet in any timeline and just immediately start working on complicated sciencey things.
I keep thinking about Mobius noticing Loki acting different. About how he was the ONLY one who noticed, and he wasn’t calm and collected about it. He grabbed hold of Loki’s suit and didn’t let go, because touch is how they communicate seriousness. He said what the SHIT are you doing Loki? What the shit are you going to do? This is *not* how you normally act and you’re scaring me.
ALT